Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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