I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
