And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize