he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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