i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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