im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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