You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
