Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize
