grandma shit on top of the toilet
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
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