I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize