i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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