What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
