Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
