just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Randomize
