she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
no you cant smoke seaweed
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
We are two peas in an std pod
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Randomize