Well apparently he's into motor boating.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize