Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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