the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
