The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
We need a shit load of segways right now
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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