Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
