Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
How does one acquire holy water?
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
