i wish there were pregnant emoticons
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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