How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
