I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
