is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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