did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Randomize
