I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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