happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
