It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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