Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Randomize
