Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
