I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
