Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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