I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
