u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Randomize
