And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Randomize