is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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