Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
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