At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
