I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize