Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
