The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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