Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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