I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Randomize
