why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
