I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I need water and some morals
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize