I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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