I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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