Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Actions speak louder than pants.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
