Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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