I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize
